Crookshanks's Bane
by Dancing Through Life
Summary: Hermione is snowed in at Hogwarts for Christmas, so her parents send her a present to keep both her and Crookshanks amused. However, nothing is what it seems...
1. Loose Feathers and Devoted Parents

Disclaimer: I own Marta, to appear in later chapters.

Pairing: NONE!

A/N: This was one of those middle of the night "I got an idea!"s. Just before we start, my updating probably won't be very regular, because my schedule is not a nice one. So, point is I will do my best, but don't expect regular updates. I'm warning you now! Also, this chapter is more of an intro to what's going to come, so be patient, please!

Snow was steadily falling around the castle. On most Christmases, that was a spirit warming occurrence, but now Hermione was just plain upset. Her parents always took her somewhere exotic for Christmas, but they were snowed in at home. Stupid Muggles…the snow had been falling for two weeks straight, and her parents didn't want to risk going anywhere too far this year, and they considered the trek to King's Cross station "too far". Pulling her knees farther beneath her at the table beside the window, Hermione could not believe that she wasn't important enough to them. She knew that she shouldn't be feeling like this – she was a sixth year and a prefect, after all – but she truly loved her parents and she felt betrayed. She had stayed at Hogwarts for Christmas before, but still –

"HERMIONE!" Her name was hollered across the Gryffindor common room. No need to turn around, only one person screeched like that. Everyone shut up and stopped what they were doing to watch. They knew that when the two of them started, it got interesting.

"What, Ron?" She snapped as he stomped over. "If this is about the homework, I told you five times that I'm not going to give you everything anymore so –"

"IT IS NOT ABOUT HOMEWORK!" He bellowed, clearly enraged. "I THOUGHT YOU HAD LEARNED HOW TO CONTROL THAT CAT!" Hermione sighed. Three years ago, her fluffy ginger cat, Crookshanks, had been the bane of Ron's existence. Ron and Crookshanks had not started well, because while Ron had been buying rat tonic for his pet rat Scabbers, Crookshanks tried to attack Scabbers but instead landed on Ron's head. Hermione had bought Crookshanks two minutes later, and for the entire third year, Crookshanks had taken every opportunity to attack Scabbers, causing Scabbers so much distress that he eventually faked his own death until it was revealed that it was indeed a fake and he was an Animagus who was thought to be dead.

During that time, Hermione had been a faithful owner, protecting Crookshanks. After Scabbers left, Crookshanks and Ron still weren't bosom buddies, but they were civil to each other. Ron stopped kicking Crookshanks, and Crookshanks didn't chase Ron's owl.

"What did he do, get fur on your pillow or something?" Hermione asked. She spied Harry through her peripheral vision deeply absorbed in his homework. She would have to ask him for the full story later. But wait….Harry? Actually doing his homework while Ron was yelling at her, and the whole rest of the common room watching? That was not right.

"HE ATTACKED PIG!" Ron began. "THESE WERE ON MY BED, AND PIG IS SCARED TO DEATH! HE WON'T COME OUT FROM BEHIND MY PILLOW!" He threw some miniscule wing feathers on the table in front of her. His red face began to soften a little. Clearly, letting the anger out in front of everyone helped. And not to mention he knew that it would cause major embarrassment for whoever won this spat.

"Did you see him do this?" She asked calmly. She had been this root before. Obviously, he had forgotten – again.

"No, but come one! We all know your monster –"

"Who is not a monster but a very affectionate cat, but continue, please" She said tartly, noticing one feather that looked different then the others.

" - Has attacked my animals before! What more proof is needed?" Hermione smiled. With the evidence given, she pretty much could figure out what had happened.

"Well Ron," She responded. "A great many things could have attacked Pig then. I, for one, would not blame Crookshanks right away." She picked up the oddball feather.

"Tell me Ron, does Crookshanks have feathers?"

"Of course not, he's a bloody cat!"

"Precisely. Now compare this feather to the others." Ron snatched it from her hand.

"It's…grey." He said slowly.

"Wow, any faster and you could be a rocket scientist!" She answered. "Now, what color is Pig?" She watched Harry get more and more involved with his – wait a minute, what book was he holding? That was her Arithmancy book! Ooooohh, she was gonna get him good later.

At that exact moment, he saw her looking at him. He checked the book and his eyes went as wide as his glasses rims. He put the Arithmancy book down and replaced with his own potions book. There now. All was forgiven. She would not have to hurt him.

"And what color is Pig?" She continued, trying not to look at Harry.

"He's…tan. By the way, what's a rocket scientist?"

"Never mind" She responded quickly. The last thing she needed right now was to describe one of the most challenging Muggle jobs – which, she was certain, he would not understand anyway.

"Geez, sorry Hermione," Ron said, his face going red with embarrassment. "I, uh, better go back upstairs and try and figure out what actually did happen." He grabbed the rest of the feathers and then ran upstairs. The common room was still silent. Colin Creevey pointed his wand at the wall and muttered something, and all of a sudden a great scoreboard appeared on the wall. On closer look, Hermione realized that her name was on one side, and Ron's was on the other. The number beneath her name read "thirty two" and the number beneath Ron's read "Three". Hermione watched in amazement was her number suddenly became thirty three, which caused the board to vanish and the common room to become noisy again.

"Unbelievable." She shook her head and noticed that Harry was watching her again. "Harry, will you come over here a minute?"

Harry sheepishly got up and sat next to her.

"You owe me big time, you know that, right?" She said through gritted teeth. "You can't let Hedwig attack him like that, she could kill him!"

"I know!" He hissed back guiltily. "But he annoys her so much that I don't see how it's possible!"

"You could talk to Hedwig" She suggested. Harry looked as though he swallowed a lemon.

"TALK to her? Clearly, Hermione, you don't know my owl. She does her owl duty in delivering things, but other then that, she acts like a tyrant. She never listens."

Hermione shrugged.

"Suit yourself. Ron's bound to figure it out eventually. By the way, do you think Hedwig would be willing to offer me her services?"

"Depends. How far?"

"I need to send a letter to Mum and Dad. Just tell them how things are going here, in this weather." Something bumped against her leg.

"Come here, Sweetheart," She cooed, pulling the huge mass of orange fur onto her lap. "You didn't attack that hyper little owl, did you? No, you're above that, aren't you? Yes, you are…"

Harry stifled a laugh, which made Hermione snap back to reality.

"Quiet, you" she snapped, as Harry lost it and broke down hysterically.

"He's lonely" She explained. He doesn't have any other cats to hang around with up here, I try to keep him company.

"Oh yeah, like baby talking him would work," He scoffed. Hermione's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"If I remember correctly, Mr. Potter," Her voice as oily as Professor Snapes', which actually gave Harry chills down his back, "I just saved your butt big time, and caught you trying to look innocent with my Arithmancy book."

Harry went grey.

"Sorry" He said quickly. "When do you want Hedwig?"


	2. Laziness And Letters

Disclaimer: I own Marta. I also do NOT own The Sound of Music. Very Unfortunate.

A/N: OMG! All reviewers, thank you all so very much! I'll try to update as much as possible…but as I said in my last chapter, my schedule is not a nice one, so my writing time is very limited. But wow, that was the warmest reception to a story I've gotten yet. Thank you very very much!

A/N I got this chapter out much sooner then I thought I would. But exams are in two weeks, so be patient for number three.

Hermione stared at the parchment. Come on, she thought to herself. It's a letter to Mum and Dad, why is this so difficult?

She knew why it was difficult, even if she didn't want to admit it. She wanted to write a hate letter. But it was December 23, and her parents were very good to her – usually. She knew that she was being very immature, because her parents could not control the weather. It was a fact of life. But she did want to write them Christmas wishes, and things were difficult at the moment.

"Dear Mum and Dad"

Well, good start. But that's what everyone wrote at the beginning of letters, so did that even count as effort? Normally, Hermione would say no. But these were the Christmas Holidays, and she was tired, annoyed, and overall feeling very lazy so in her mind she answered that question with a yes.

"Merry Christmas!" Wow, she was really feeling it now.

"I hope that you are doing well. Ron just tried to accuse Crookshanks of attacking his owl, but I proved him otherwise. Even though Ron doesn't know this, it was actually Harry's owl Hedwig who attacked Pig. She delivered this letter. Isn't she beautiful? Don't worry, she isn't dangerous. Ron's owl has just had it coming for a long while."

Hermione looked down at her handy work and shook her head. Even in her lazy state, this was not good. But Hedwig had just flown into the common room to leave Harry a note from Hagrid and Harry could only keep her there so long.

"Snow continues to fall here. Doesn't look like it's going to stop for a while, either. Is it like that at home?"

All of a sudden, Crookshanks jumped up on the table, tipping the inkwell. Fortunately, it spilled away from the letter. But Crookshanks did step in it before daintily placing a paw on the letter.

"Crookshanks!" Hermione scolded. She pulled out her wand, muttered something, and the spilled ink vanished. However, the paw print remained.

"Crookshanks sends his love, as you can see. I think he's been lonely lately. Whenever I'm in the common room, he's not so far away, and whenever he sees the opportunity he plops himself on my lap . The only other cat in the Gryffindor common room belonged to a seventh year from last year, so the only possible friend he may have had is no longer among us. Ah well. I can keep him company."

And then it happened. For the first time in her life, Hermione Granger faced an evil beyond any other: Writers' Block.

"I got to go now. I've got homework that needs to be done. I love you both, and Merry Christmas!"

Hermione smiled. No hate what so ever.

"Love forever from your daughter,

Hermione"

On the other side of the common room, Hedwig was getting impatient. All the more reason why the letter had to be short. Rolling it up, she walked toward the irritated bird.

"Hey Hedwig" Hermione said softly. The round pair of amber eyes stared back at her.

"Take this to my parents, will you? I'm sorry to have kept you waiting."

If owls could talk, Hermione was sure Hedwig would be saying "Well, you did. You owe me big time!" Hedwig stuck her leg out to Hermione. This time, the owl lingo was "Get on with it, why don't you?"

Hermione leaned over and tied the letter to Hedwigs' insistent leg, Hedwigs' eyes never wavering. She glared at Hermione, expecting some kind of thanks.

"I'll give you food when you get back, and yes, I know, the weather's awful." With this last statement Hedwig hooted angrily and took off without looking back.

"Geez, Hermione, don't turn my owl against people." Harry said, coming up behind her. "You know, when I'm with the Dursleys, she's the only living thing in the house that doesn't cringe when she sees me (A/N The basis of this line property of JKR). Please don't make me suffer alone!"

"Relax, Harry" Hermione said, picking up Crookshanks and tucking him beneath her arm. "Hedwig's just mad that she has to fly in this weather. I would be."

Harry shrugged.

"Yeah, well, I've – "

"Harry Potter, don't you dare give the "I've played Quidditch in just about every weather speech!" Hermione could feel her cabin fever building. It would take all of her self control just to maintain this boiling tempest inside of her to a rain shower. In an effort not to scream at him, she turned and faced the window sill, pulling Crookshanks tight against her chest.

"Hermione, I was just trying to make a point about having seen her fly in every kind of weather."

Hermione took a deep breath and turned to face Harry.

"I'm sorry, Harry." She began, "It's just been difficult lately, with my parents being snowed in, and I'm tired." She once again tucked Crookshanks under one arm and reached out to hug Harry. "It's nothing against you, I think I just need to go to bed now."

Harry pulled away from her looking shocked.

"But it's only nine o'clock!" He gasped. "There isn't any school crucial assignment that needs to be finished in order to save the world?" She glared at his Cheshire Cat grin.

"Ha ha, very funny. No, there is not. By the way, it's probably a good thing that you let me use Hedwig. It's not going to be long before Ron figures out who really attacked Pig."

"No he won't." That reply was a bit too casual for Hermione's liking.

"Harry, Ron does pass here, even if he does copy off my homework half the time. He will figure it out."

"HARRY POTTER!" An enraged roar came from the boy's dormitories. Wow, that must be a record – two in one night.

"Told you so," Hermione muttered. "See you tomorrow, Harry."

"But you're not just going to leave me here, are you?" He begged desperately.

"Now Harry, you wouldn't want Ron to think I egged her on, now do you?" She said quite mischievously as a very red Ron stormed over to Harry.

"'Night, Boys"

"Night, Hermione" Harry answered, trying to look innocent and failing miserably. Ron didn't even answer, but as she was climbing the stairs to the girl's dorm (Crookshanks at her heels), she heard Ron screaming at Harry.

"YOU WERE MY BLOODY BEST FRIEND, YOUR PRECIOUS GODFATHER GAVE HIM TO ME, AND WHAT DOES YOUR MONSTER DO?"

It went on for a long while, but as Hermione slipped into her comfortable cotton pajamas, all the world seemed to be nothing more but a dream. Just like in that song, the one about rowing the boat down the stream. At that moment when she first slipped under her covers, she felt at peace with herself. Maybe it was because she managed to get her cat out of trouble with Ron, something that she had never been able to do quite truthfully, and she was proud of it.

Crookshanks jumped up on the bed with Hermione, and soon plopped himself on her stomach. Instinctively, her hand went up and she began to pet him. He purred softly. Ron was still having a go at Harry, but with the doors closed she couldn't quite make out what was being said.

"Yes, Buddy, those big nasty boys down there are still at it, aren't they? And this time it's not about you, you're too nice to attack such a pathetic owl, because you know he's not worth the effort, don't you?"

Crookshanks continued to purr and became ever more demanding on where he wanted to be petted.

When his purring decreased and his eyes were firmly shut, Hermione slowed her speed and decreased the pressure of the pet and with her other hand picked up her book and began to read it. It was a good book, really; a mystery involving the overly glamorous wife of a banker. She read until her eyes became too heavy to keep open any longer, and before long she was asleep.

Christmas Eve went by in a blur. The day went by quickly, but otherwise was quite uneventful. Three more points were added to Hermione's side of the board, which Hermione was certain that Ron still didn't know about yet, judging by the fact that she had only found out the day before. The snow had still not stopped falling. Hermione wondered if it would ever stop, and how much the muggles were worrying over this. She was also worried about Hedwig. Sure, she had saved her from possible mutilation from Ron, but was sending her to do a delivery in this weather too much to ask? Yes, Harry had said that he'd seen Hedwig do deliveries in this kind of weather, but it was ridiculous how much it was snowing, and it could be very dangerous.

When she hadn't returned by the time Hermione crawled into bed that night, Hermione was very worried. That had been dumb. Very dumb. What if she got lost and ended up on the other side of England? What if she flew head-on into a tree? Thoughts like these would not leave Hermione alone until at last her eyes fell shut on their own.

The next day, the first thing Hermione saw when she woke up was a huge pair of brown eyes staring back into her own.

"Hello, Hedwig" She murmured. She was about to lay back and fall asleep again; it had been well past one when she had finally fallen asleep, but then she saw the pile of presents at the foot of her bed and realized that she would not fall asleep again until all had been opened.

As Hermione leaned in to grab a present, Hedwig hooted angrily at her. Hermione then realized that she would be a promise breaker soon if she didn't do something.

"Hedwig, give me a minute, someone would have had to send me food."

Hedwig ruffled her feathers, clearly angry that Hermione hadn't prepared for this.

She sat on the floor and unwrapped the first parcel. It was a book called "Hexes For The Teenaged Girl" by Ramona Frackette from Ginny. Of course. Ever since Fred had taught Ron the shield charm that worked against her bat-bogey hex, Ginny had been at a loss on how to teach Ron that she was indeed a person who had feelings. Hermione was willing to bet her prefects badge that Ginny had bought a copy for herself, too.

The next present made Hermione groan, which was not something she would usually do. She obviously had made a mistake in politely telling Hagrid that she liked his teeth gluing treacle fudge, because he sent her a tin.

Note to self, she thought as she set the tin aside. Never be honest with Hagrid when it came to his cooking.

From Hermione's bed post, Hedwig hooted angrily.

"Trust me, you don't want this" Hermione warned Hedwig, but Hedwig would not relent, so Hermione opened the tin and held out a piece for Hedwig.

"Don't say I didn't warn you!" Hermione called after Hedwig as she flew out the window. Hermione opened the rest of the presents in peace. She received a new sweater from Harry in the pale blue that he knew she liked, a pair of mismatched socks from Dobby, a Chudley Canons Hat from Ron, and a pair of earrings with badgers on them from Luna.

As Hermione was cleaning up her wrappings, she realized that she had not received anything from her parents. Odd. Hedwig had come back, after all.

And then she saw the letter.

It had been lying at the foot of her bed. How could she have been so blind?

"Dearest Hermione," The letter read.

"Thanks for the holiday wishes, they were greatly appreciated. The snow continues to fall here, and there's no sign of it stopping. Yes, Hedwig is indeed beautiful, thank you for assuring us that she isn't dangerous. Tell Crookshanks we send our love right back to him. We're sorry to hear he's been lonely; don't spend too much time trying to comfort him though, cats are naturally solitary so don't spoil him.

We are so sorry that it was impossible for you to come home for Christmas this year. We know that nothing material can make up for that, but we hope that the presents we send at least help. We think that Crookshanks will like one of them very much, from your description of what's been going on with him lately.

Merry Christmas and lots of love,

Mum and Dad."

Hermione was confused. Her parents hadn't sent anything, there was nothing in the pile from them. Maybe they had fallen off and slipped under the bed? She got down on her knees and checked.

No, nothing under the bed.

As she sat up confusedly, three owls entered the room. Ah, there they were. One was long and skinny, probably a poster of some sort. The other parcel was very strange looking.

It looked like three Chinese food boxes secured together side by side with only god knew what. The two owls that carried it were holding it by the little wire handles of the boxes. Along the outside were holes. What on earth?

Two of the owls set the two packages down at the foot of the bed, hooted a greeting, and flew off. The other owl dropped the tube – like gift on the floor and faced her. He held a letter in his beak, which Hermione took gratefully. He then took off.

Well, her parents really got into this writing thing now, didn't they? She opened the second letter

"Hermione, open the tube first." It said.

Not wishing to argue with her parents, she did so.

It was a huge movie poster of The Sound of Music, that American movie that she loved so much. It made her squeal with joy when she saw the giant form of Julie Andrews in the nun's habit. When she unrolled it, another note fell out, and on the outside were strict instructions not to open the note until the other present was opened.

Reading those, instructions, Hermione turned to the other box (Or was it boxes? It was still hard to tell, even with a better look) but almost instantly jumped back in fear.

The box moved.


	3. Surprises And Angry Owls

Disclaimer: I own Marta.

A/N Thank you all so much for the reviews! Well, exams are now over, so I'll have a life again! YAY! I hope you enjoy this chapter. Just a note – I've been asked this several times, and I predict it will be asked again, so I'll answer it now. No, I'm positive that there will be no pairing in this story. I'm not a big shipper, I personally prefer humor to Romance. I'm currently writing a fic with a couple of friends (No, it is not posted yet), and even though that's very shippy, none of my chapters are. So no, there will be no match up in this story, and I'm sorry if that disappoints anyone.

Hermione pulled out her wand and approached the shaking box slowly. On reaching the bed, she nervously picked up the box and looked for a way to open it. When she discovered the taped flap on the side, she gently stuck her fingernail beneath the tape, opened the flap, and reached in. Her hand curled around fur; she gasped as she pulled out a kitten.

The kitten was black and white, but the markings were not normal ones. The chest and underside were completely white, but on each leg there was one large black spot, making it look like the kitten was wearing tattered white gloves. White fur lined the chin, and though the coloring stopped at the base of the nose on the right, it extended almost all the way up to the sapphire blue eye on the left. The furless part of the nose was black…but a thin stripe of white crept up the right side of the nose until it grew into a blaze that resembled a white version of the northern lights. Long white fur grew out of the ears, and there was a large white spot on the kitten's back. The tail was completely black. It would be a very beautiful kitten, except for the tail and the eyelashes. The jet black tail was longer then the rest of the cat, and the eyelashes looked like jump ropes falling from the face.

Hermione just stared at the shivering kitten for a moment. It was so small, it couldn't be more then two months old.

Hermione realized that her parents probably wanted her to open the poster first because the note was embedded in it, her mother knew that Hermione wouldn't be able to open the poster once she had seen the kitten, and the note probably had the details about the cat. Her mother knew her way to well.

Hermione gently placed the ball of fluff in her lap and opened the note.

"Hermione, Ricky's cat had her kittens, so when you told me that Crookshanks was lonely, I thought that maybe you would like one of them."

Hermione smiled. Ricky was her family's neighbor, and he was a vet.

"The one we picked out for you is a female. She is five weeks old. We understand that five weeks is a little young to be separated from the mother, but Ricky adopted another female cat three weeks ago, and she's been nasty to the kittens so Ricky had to give them away as soon as they were off milk. She's been given her all her shots, and she's a very happy little girl. She'll be a little shaky when you get her; we didn't know how else to get her there. Just give her lots of love on the first day, and she should be fine by Boxing Day. I thought it would be a fun project for you to raise a kitten all on your own, and she can keep Crookshanks busy. Your father has asked me to remind you, however, that school work comes first. Keep that in mind as you raise her. Happy tails!

Love you Lots,

Mum"

Sounds fair enough, Hermione thought.

She looked down at the big blue eyes that stared timidly back into her own.

"I need to give you a name, don't I?" She whispered to the kitten.

Suddenly, Crookshanks jumped up on the bed with them. When he saw the new member of their small family on the bed, he gave Hermione the look of death, walked agitatedly past them, and snuggled into Hermione's pillow, ignoring them.

"Don't do that, she's here to stay, and you will accept that fact." Hermione said sternly. "From now on, you are Uncle Crookshanks, and once I allow her out of the common room by herself, you will teach her how to get around Hogwarts safely. Understood?"

Crookshanks ignored her.

"Fine, be that way." She snapped. Right, naming time.

Looking at the poster, Hermione decided to name her Marta. That would be her first name. She hadn't had the opportunity to name Crookshanks, so Hermione decided that she would make up for that with Marta. Marta's full name would be Marta Maria Brigitta Louisa Liesel Gretel. Hermione smiled. All the names from the prominent female characters from The Sound of Music. Her mother would probably hate her for all of those names, but Mum did say that Marta was Hermione's project, after all.

Hermione then realized that Ron and Harry would probably attempt to get into the dorms again if she didn't go down and relate her spoils of presents to them, so she put her robe on and tucked Marta into it.

Ron and Harry were sitting at a table playing chess. Ron had gotten yet another maroon sweater from his mother, and Dobby had also clearly paid Harry another visit because Harry had mismatched socks on with assorted quidditch themes on both. Both seemed quite happy and content with it being Christmas. One creature in the room, however, was not: Marta had decided that she did not like seeing this big room with strange people in it while being held by a strange person, so she tried to dig deeper into the robe.

Poor baby, Hermione thought, cradling the scared kitten.

"Hey Harry!" She called. Harry and Ron both looked up.

"Merry Christmas! How did your present lot turn out?" She asked, concealing the shaking lump with her arms.

"Ah, the usual. The Kleenex from the Dursleys, the treacle fudge from Hagrid, the pastries from Mrs. Weasley, the advanced flying tips book from you, the chocolate frogs from Ron, and the socks from Dobby" Harry said nonchalantly.

"I got the maroon sweater from Mum, some strange looking candy from Fred and George I'm wise enough not to try, treacle fudge from Hagrid, the socks from Dobby, the remedial potions book you were kind enough to get me, a box of Fizzing Wizbees from Harry, a suspicious looking box from Ginny, and a new chessboard from Bill and Charlie." Ron said, his mouth full of candy. "How was yours?"

"The socks from Dobby, the sweater from Harry, the colorful hat from you, treacle fudge from Hagrid, a book from Ginny, a pair of earrings from Luna, a purr from Crookshanks, and a poster from my parents." Hermione smiled a devious grin.

"I know that look" Harry said suddenly, turning to Ron.

"What look is that?" Asked Ron, slightly confused.

"It's the look Hermione gets whenever she's secretly pleased with herself." Harry commented. "Out with it. What's the big secret?"

Hermione's smile increased.

"My parents also sent me a kitten" She revealed, pulling Marta out of her robe. The fur on the back of Marta's head was now sticking up straight. The kitten saw the big room and instantly tried to crawl back into Hermione's robe, but missed the opening. Hermione swiftly caught her and tucked her back in.

"Sorry – this is scary for a kitten this age. You know, big room with total strangers after a long, scary journey…"

The boys were staring at the shaking lump. Neither of them seemed able to speak. Finally, the ability to do so returned to Harry.

"How did your parents get that here?" He asked. Ron was still staring wide eyed, jaw hanging open with no apparent means to move. Hermione's eyes narrowed.

"What was that, Mr. Potter?" Her voice had a dangerous quiver to it that Harry knew all too well.

"I mean – is it a boy or a girl?" The danger in Hermione's face evaporated.

"It's a girl. Mum got her here in what looks like cleverly connected Chinese food boxes."

"Your mother sent you food from China?" Ron managed to say at last.

"No, Ron. Muggles tend to eat food from many different cultures, and the Chinese food places all send food home in very similar boxes."

"What's her name?" Harry asked.

"Marta. Marta Maria Brigitta Louisa Liesel Gretal."

"I dare you to say that again." Ron said, not impressed at all.

"How's Crookshanks handling her arrival?" Harry inquired. Hermione winced.

"Not well. He saw her and then gave me the total brush off. He is currently asleep on my pillow, ignoring me. He probably feels replaced, which I was hoping wouldn't happen, because nothing could replace my Crookers. He just has a niece now."

Suddenly Hedwig flew into the common room, clearly in a rage. The angered owl made a beeline for Hermione, who ducked just in time.

"I warned you!" Hermione called, crawling under table.

"Hermione, what did you do to my owl?" Harry asked, confused.

"I gave her some of Hagrid's treacle fudge" Hedwig was now gliding above the common room, clearly looking for a way to get to Hermione. Their fellow Gryffindors who had remained at Hogwarts for Christmas were now staring at the floating owl, wondering what was going on. Fortunately, Hermione saw Colin make no move toward his wand, which meant there was no scoreboard for her and Harry. Well, why should there be? Hermione and Harry almost never fought.

"YOU WHAT?" Harry roared.

"On December 23, I promised her some food when she returned from delivering my letter. The first (and only) food item that I opened was the treacle fudge. She would've pecked me all over until I gave her some, what was I supposed to do?"

At this, Harry lost for words.

"Um..Harry? Can you do me a favor?" Hermione asked.

Harry grumbled. But he agreed.

"Thank you" Hermione responded graciously.

As Harry called the peeved owl down from the air to saw open her beak, Hermione made a mad dash toward the dorms, holding the shaking ball tightly. As Hermione climbed the stairs, she heard flapping wings behind her. She quickened her pace, and slammed the door behind her. A moment later, there was a loud thud on the other side. Lord, I'm going to get it later, Hermione thought.

Then a horrifying thought hit her.

The window was open.

Hermione rushed to the window and pulled it shut as fast as she could, even though Hedwig was nowhere in sight.

Hermione sat on her bed, setting Marta in a fold of the quilt. Hermione was well aware that an orange eye that was pretending not to be open was staring at her from a slitted eye socket buried in her pillow. But she would talk to that cat later, when the baby was down for her nap.

The baby? She had known the kitten for what, an hour now?

Hermione was now stuck with a situation that she did not know how to fix. Hogwarts had a million nooks and crannies in it, how was she going to keep Marta from getting lost or hurt without putting her under dorm arrest, with keeping up with her studies?

Mum had clearly not thunk all of this through.

The only possible solution was that she would have to talk to her dorm mates, Parvati and Lavender, and possible have them kitten-sit now and then, but Hermione was top witch in her class, and she knew that with those two, once a week would turn into once a day and once a day would turn into once an hour until Hermione wouldn't own the cat anymore.

So no, that wouldn't work.

What about Ginny? She could be trusted not to dominate over the poor fuzz ball.

All of a sudden, Crookshanks stood up, stretched, and cautiously padded his way through the many blankets to where the ball of furr sat.

"Good boy, Crookshanks!" Hermione exclaimed excitedly. "Marta, say hello to Uncle Crookshanks!"

Hermione released a sigh of relief. Crookshanks's trying to be friendly was a good sign, because being the intelligent beast he was, he could help Marta get around Hogwarts safely.

But as Crookshanks leaned over to sniff his new companion, Marta's eyes went wide, and without hesitation, she jumped up and whacked him across the nose.

"Marta Maria Brigitta Louisa Liesel Gretel!" Hermione gasped. "What was that?"

Marta just stared back at her with her big, blue, innocent eyes.

Crookshanks, however, was not pleased. With a disdainful look, he daintily jumped off the bed and planted his back end on the floor beside the closed door.

Hermione walked over to where he sat and began to pet him.

"It's okay, Buddy. You're still my boy, remember that. She's just a baby and needs someone to take care of her. Someone like you. Will you do that for me?"

His squinted eyes told her that at the moment, he didn't care. He just wanted the door opened. Hermione pet him once more, and turned the knob.

He trotted down the stairs, bottle brush tail held high in the air. Regretfully, Hermione closed the door behind him. She wasn't worried about him – at home, he had taken on everything from large wild fowl to deer, so Hedwig wouldn't be able to tear him apart.

But Marta would not be able to defend herself against Hedwig (And neither would I, Hermione thought grimly), so the door had to stay closed for at least a little while longer. She felt terrible about locking out Crookshanks, however. The last thing she wanted was Crookshanks to feel replaced.

As Hermione returned to the bed, Marta began to explore it. Being as young as she was, there was no way she could jump off the bed safely, but that did not stop her at all from exploring every inch of the bed. She even climbed underneath the strewn blankets and explored that, too.

Since Marta clearly was busy with the bed, Hermione did some scouting of her own. She wanted to be positive that the dorm was kitten friendly. After a thorough investigation beneath the beds (All five of them), behind the wardrobes, and every other corner she could think of, she declared it safe.

Hermione smiled to herself. Having a kitten, she decided, would be fun.


	4. Snow and Scratches

Disclaimer: See previous ones.

A/N I never said this, but this story takes place in Sixth Year. And I know that I say Hermione is seventeen…but JK Rowling herself says that Hermione turned twelve in September of First Year, so by December of Sixth Year, she would be seventeen. Just wanted to clear that up in advance. This chapter is also shorter then my previous ones; I know I had Spring Break, but I had a block. This chapter was nasty to write, and I know that it doesn't seem like much plotwise, but I'm getting there. Just bear with me on that one.

Several hours later, Hermione declared it safe to leave the room. Marta was fast a sleep on a lump of comforter, and the room had been kitty proofed from top to bottom. She cautiously opened the door and proceeded down the stairs. Crookshanks met her with a slight meow and marched to one of his tunnels to the grounds with his tail high in the air. That was so nice of whoever made Gryffindor tower – cat holes so the owners weren't harassed by their animals when they needed to go out.

Harry was waiting for her at the foot of the stairs.

"I managed to calm her down after an hour." He snickered.

"Cool it, you." She answered coolly. Her eyes then instinctively moved to the window; she gasped in surprise.

"Harry! It stopped snowing! Thank Merlin!" She then turned and hugged him. It was the first time in two weeks. It had varied – usually it was a light snow, but every once and a while it would come down in buckets – causing her parents to fear the roads enough that they told her to stay at school.

"Hermione! You are seventeen years old! Stop embarrassing me!" Hermione looked at him, and realized she had gotten slightly carried away and had jumped on him.

"Sorry." She said, returning to her own feet. "That happens when I get excited. But come on! Get some warm grubbies on, lets go play in the snow!"

"Grubbies?"

"Old clothes that are to be worn in situations that require the wearer get messy."

"I can't believe you jumped on me!"

"Harry! Do you want to play in the snow or not?" He seemed to ponder this for a minute.

"Good point. I'll get Ron, we'll all go out together."

Hermione ran back upstairs into her dorm. Marta was still sleeping soundly in the lump of blanket. Hermione wondered if she liked sheepskin – she had been planning on putting her rug on the bed that night, the nights were really starting to get cold.

Hermione threw on some old warm clothes. Before she left, she reached over to pet Marta's sleeping form. As Hermione pulled her hand away, Marta's front legs shot out in front of her and clung to Hermione, who jumped back in fright. Marta deployed her claws as Hermione's hand was taken from her. When Hermione was out of the demon's grasp, she saw three long scratch marks on her hand, blood beginning to seep through each one.

"Dang you" Hermione muttered. She realized that Marta had not really been asleep, and enjoyed the petting so much that she didn't want Hermione to stop.

Hermione rushed out the doors of the Great Hall. As soon as she had gotten to the bottom of her dorm stairs, she had been informed by Colin Creevey that Ron and Harry had left without her. Promising to curse them both when she got outside, she had then taken off at a run. But as soon as she was outside, feeling the cool sting of the air on her face, she felt another, less pleasant sting – the sting of an icy snowball.

"Accio Wand!" Someone yelled, and Hermione could feel her wand being pulled out of her pocket. She tried to grab it, but it slipped from her fingers.

"Now that's not fair!" She yelled at Harry.

"Yes it is" Harry said with a coy grin as Ron hurled another snowball at her. "First off, you helped me master that spell. Secondly, I only took the wand so you couldn't use it." Hedwig flew up behind him and landed on his shoulder. Hermione all of a sudden had an urge to throw the biggest, iciest snowball at her, but decided to save that for Ron, as another one hit her head."

"Hedwig will be taking all three wands up to the common room now, so we have a totally fair fight." He handed the wands to the owl who was now camoflauged with the snow. She disappeared into the sky, in the direction of Gryffindor tower.

"Do you feel defenseless now, Hermione?" Ron said with a smirk. "Because for once, I think I've out smarted you." Hermione then noticed something.

"Actually, I think not." She answered, reaching down and making a snowball. "Because, I, Ron, unlike you, understand the power of gloves" She hurled it at him, hitting him square in the face. "Therefore, I am able to make more snowballs." She began rapidly packing snow and hurling them, sometimes at Harry, sometimes at Ron.

An hour later, Ron's hands were nearly frostbitten, so they called it quits.

"And next time you want to have a snowball fight, make sure everyone has gloves!" Ron snarled at Hermione as they climbed through the portrait hole.

"Oh please, you started it, and when between Hedwig chasing me into my dormitory and you pelted me with that ice ball did we see each other?" Hermione retorted. "And next time you start hurling snowballs, make sure you have gloves. She bent over to try and get some of the snow out of her hair. Mid-flip, she saw the scoreboard go up. She smiled as she dug at her scalp.

"Harry, where's my wand?"

"Check your bed, that's where Hedwig usually drops stuff when I tell her to deliver things. Get changed, we can go to lunch."

Hermione climbed the stairs, shaking slightly. Sure, it had stopped snowing, but that didn't mean it was cold out.

Her bed was still unmade. From the doorway, she could see that her wand was indeed on the bed. Good. That probably meant Hedwig had forgiven her, and that she would stop chasing her.

Suddenly, the end of the wand moved. Startled, Hermione ran forward. Underneath a blanket was Marta, quite complacently chewing on the wand. What the heck?

"Marta Maria Brigitta Louisa Liesl Gretl!" Hermione shrieked. "What are you, a dog?"

Marta just stared back at her with her angelic blue eyes. Hermione shook her head. The wand seemed alright. Her scratched hand from earlier stung a little bit, but besides that was fine.

Wait….there was something that she needed to do. Marta obviously couldn't go outside yet, so a litterbox would be nessecary. But there had not been one included in shipping.

Brilliant one by Mrs. Granger.

Looking at the packing, Hermione was struck by an idea. Carefully running her finger around the outside, she was able to locate the tape that held it together. After retrieving her own tape, making a few adjustments and filling it with dirt from the flower pot next to Parvati's bed, she had a makeshift litter box. It wasn't much, but it would have to do for now.

Right, time to get changed.

When she was ready to go, she picked up Marta, gave her a hug, and placed her on the floor so she could explore a little bit. She instantly began running around, sticking her head everywhere.

"Bye, Baby Girl" Hermione cooed as she shut the door behind her.

For the second time that day, Harry was waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs.

"Took you long enough"

"The parental female did not equip me with a nessecary kitty utensil known to Muggles as a litterbox. I figured it would be nessecary after a while." Harry cringed.

"Ah, I see what you mean. Ron got fed up and left already. I think we'd better go before he thinks we're an item or something." He then noticed the scratch on her hand.

"Holy Merlin!" He gasped." Hermione, how did you get that?"

"Marta. I reached down to pet her and when I pulled away, she told me she didn't want me to stop. She's only a baby – she doesn't know how strong her claws really are."

"Hermione, I really think you should go to the Hospital Wing. You only just got the kitten this morning, you don't know what she could have on her claws!"

Hermione ignored him. It was, after all, only a little scratch.


	5. Drugged House Elves And Portrait Affairs

Disclaimer: See Previous ones, except I own the first name of the Fat Lady.

A/N: I'm sorry this took so long to get out….I had whoa writer's block. This is not the greatest or longest chapter, it's more of a transition chapter. Also – I'm upping the rating.

Lunch was fairly uneventful, unless you count Ron's reaction over Harry's remark about how Professor Snape never had any chance for hugs as a child because his nose was so huge no one could wrap their arms around him. When Harry said this, Ron had been taking a swig of pumpkin juice, and ended up spraying the entire table with it. Thankfully, everyone who had gotten sprayed had heard the remark and found it just as funny, so there were no awkward questions.

Hermione spent the rest of the day in the common room, watching Marta explore every nook and cranny down there, too. Crookshanks was no where in sight. He was probably out on the grounds chasing one of the gnomes that Professor Sprout had planted over the Summer. Even though she used to love him, Professor Sprout was really starting to hate Crookshanks – it was becoming a custom for her to arrive in a greenhouse and find at least one terrified gnome.

The time was for Christmas dinner was approaching. Hermione scooted Marta up to the dorm, and then joined Ron and Harry on their way to the Great Hall. Christmas Dinner, like usual, was incredible. Anything everyone could have wanted was there. For the past couple of years, Hermione had had a tinge of guilt about eating a meal that must have taken several days for hundreds of House Elves to prepare, but that feeling usually left her after she dug in. It was mainly because she forgot, but it was also partly because she left them candy treats of their own in the kitchen. Besides, why shouldn't everyone celebrate Christmas?

"Hermione, what are you doing?" Ron asked suspiciously as she scraped food into a napkin.

"I'm stealing food to send to Viktor so he'll fatten up a bit, what's it look like?" She answered innocently as she scraped some more roast beef into her napkin. Harry snorted into his pumpkin juice. Ron looked mortified.

"You're still talking to him?" He asked.

"Actually, I'm taking some food to my brother and my little girl. It's a holiday – why shouldn't everyone celebrate it?"

"Your brother and little girl? How did Crookshanks all of a sudden become you're brother? That seems a bit strange to me. And you're stealing them the best beef there is! They don't understand Christmas! And I notice that you haven't had Marta for a full day yet and she's already wounded you." Ron looked very confused, but slightly proud of himself. It was rare he could make an argument this good. Hermione sighed.

"I took Crookshanks to a Muggle veterinarian over the summer, and even though he had trouble identifying the breed, as Crookshanks is half Kneazle, he did a bone marrow test, and Crookshanks and I are very close in age. Therefore, my father started making jokes about the cat and I being twins, and it stuck within our family. It's like a family joke now. Marta – she's only five weeks old, so I'll be raising her from basically the beginning, making her my baby. And cats are generally smarter than they appear – hang around Crookshanks long enough and you'll see what I mean. And just because they're not human does not mean that they do not deserve the best! They know something's going on, they're very perceptive to my feelings. As for the scratch, she doesn't know her own sharpness." She stole a glance at the meat.

"And this isn't even good meat – it's not the fine quality stuff they usually serve. So technically, it is not the best beef there is."

Ron shrugged and continued on his pork chops. Hermione, with a satisfied air about her, continued to swipe food into her napkin. As she finished, Dumbledore stood up from his chair.

"It has come to my attention that students have been stealing food from the kitchens by drugging the house elves with butter beer and then taking some large amount of food. As some of you may have noticed, the Christmas roast is not as spectacular as most of our Christmas roasts are. We ask whoever is doing this to please desist immediately. Our house elves are a vital part of our lives here. Without them, a good portion of our day would consist of cleaning this extensive castle, and they deserve the respect of every one of us."

He sat down and the meal continued. There had been a tone to his voice that not many students had heard. Harry, with his connection to Voldemort had heard it, and since Ron and Hermione went with him nearly everywhere, they had heard it too. Now, after the speech, the feeling in the air was one of nervousness. Hermione shot Ron and Harry a seething look.

"What? We didn't do it! Do you really think Dobby would have left me presents otherwise?" Harry argued quickly.

Hermione shrugged. Harry had a point.

The rest of dinner was very enjoyable. By the end, everyone had forgotten about Dumbledore's serious tone. Indeed, Dumbledore himself seemed to forget, as he created a marvelous display of fireworks with his wand.

"I really wish I knew who was drugging the house elves" Hermione wondered ruefully as they made their way to the Common Room later.

"What would you do? Hex them into telling Madam Rosmerta to disguise a sock and put it in the bottles?" Ron sneered.

"I wasn't planning on freeing the house elves. I think that if they have to work brainwashed with those unfair terms, they should be left in peace. "

"You weren't planning on freeing them? Wow, this is new."

"Freedom comes later. Right now – "

"I know, I know, educate and love. Like that would really – "

"Will you two cut it out? It's Christmas for Merlin's sake!" Harry butt in. "Honestly, can't you two leave it alone for just one day?"

"No" Ron and Hermione answered simultaneously.

"Fine then. I'm going to bed." Harry turned to look at the Fat Lady, who looked quite frazzled. Her dress was rumpled, and her usually pristinely in-place hair was loose and falling out of the pins that held it there. She also had a dazed look about her, like she had had too much mulled mead.

"Pa-password?" She managed.

"Cadogan" Harry snapped.

"Who calls me forth with such anger in his voice? Eudora, if these bilfering knaves have called me forward, why was there any reason for me to hide?" Sir Cadogan, wearing only a tunic, emerged from underneath a blanket thrown behind the Fat Lady. He too, looked drunk. Ron had a hard time suppressing a snicker.

"Cadogan, dear? That's the p-password" The Fat Lady stammered. "I t-told you to h-hide because I didn't want the G-Gryffindors to see us."

"Oh…" Sir Cadogan blushed.

"Just open the door, please!" Harry snapped louder. "And get a room!"

The Far Lady shrugged while and swung the portrait hole open.

When Hermione stepped into the Common Room, she was met with an unusual sight. Crookshanks was running down the dorm stairs, clearly in fright, and as he rounded the corner, Hermione could see why. Marta had latched herself to his tail – she had it in her teeth and wouldn't let go for anything. Crookshanks was waving her around in the air as he ran, but the kitten wouldn't let go for anything. As he ran by the staring trio, he stopped, gave his tail one final swing, and whacked her into Ron's leg. With the impact, Marta let go, but then she attempted to climb up Ron's robes.

"Is this cat going to be more of a terrorist than The Monster?" Ron asked dryly, prying the kitten off his robes. Marta took this opportunity to bite him.

"Ow, Hermione, how come you keep getting cats who hate me and my pets?" Ron whined.

"Don't hold her like that, she needs support beneath her!" Hermione shrieked, grabbing the kitten.

"Oh really? Are you going to yell at Crookshanks now, for not supporting her butt? Or are you just yelling at me because it's fun?"

With this last remark, Hermione turned red with rage.

"Crookshanks has had an additude – he feels replaced! She brought it upon herself, biting his tail like that! You, however, have no reason to hate my pets. All they have done is save your butt from Peter Pettigrew and bite you! She's in a new place! Crookshanks isn't helping! I'm going to bed!"

And with that she stomped off to the girl's dorm, kitten in tow.

Ron turned to Harry.

"It hasn't even been one day, and that cat is all she thinks about. What'll it be like in a week?"

"I think she has a point, Ron," Harry said quietly. And this was where Ron lost it.

"A POINT? HOW COULD OWNING A MONSTER – NO, TWO MONSTERS – AND BLAMING EVERYTHING THEY DO ON SOMEONE ELSE HAVE A POINT?" Ron was spitting at this point. Over his redheaded friends shoulder, Harry could see Colin Creevey adding a point to Ron's side of the board, making it thirty three to four. Well, at least it was progress.

"The point wasn't that her pets beat you up, giving her right to yell at you. I agree with you on that one" Harry added quickly to Ron's opening mouth. "The point is that even though we sometimes forget, she is s girl, and has maternal instincts. She is going to be protective of that cat for a while, and will be prone to lash out a little bit."

"So you're telling me to stay out of her way because of some caveman instinct?"

"Ron – when you were a small child, did your mother ever lash out at your father because he wasn't raising the seven of you the way she wanted to?"

"She still yells at him for it! You should know it too, after the flying car!"

"It's the same with Hermione – she wants to make sure Marta grows up right. And you never know, it may also be that time of month – "

"Ew, Harry! Didn't need to think about that! Please not again, I get enough of that at home from Ginny!"

"Sorry to break it to you, but that's the way things are. Think about it."

As she lay in bed that night, Hermione had a panic attack. She had pulled Marta close to her, but she was worried that she would roll over on her. Ginny, whom Hermione was allowing to sleep in Parvati's bed, scuffed.

"Hermione, you're not going to roll over on her"

"Ginny, it's me we're talking about here! Me, who stresses over everything! What if I have a nightmare?"

"You won't."

"How do you know that for sure? Have you ganged up on me with Professor Trelawney?"

"I hate the old bat as much as you do – but when you yelled at Ron earlier, you sounded like Mum. Believe me, with maternal instincts like those, you won't hurt her."

Crookshanks jumped on Hermione's bed, like he did every night. Tonight, however, she was in for a surprise. Marta awoke suddenly, jumped up swatted him, and laid back down. Crookshanks flicked his tail at Hermione, and went to sleep with Ginny.

Marta stretched in her sleep, using Hermione's extended arm as a pillow.

Ginny laughed.

"See? She agrees with me. She trusts you enough, or she wouldn't stay there." Ginny yawned.

"Are you ready to sleep yet? I'm bloody tired." And with that, she fell asleep. Hermione followed two minutes later, Marta's head still on her arm.

When Ginny woke up the next morning, she stole a look to Hermione's bed and smiled. Neither cat nor human had moved.


	6. The Kitty Sleepover

Disclaimer: I own Marta.

A/N I am so sorry! Fall term hit and wham! No free time. I didn't even have time to finish all my work. So please don't hate me.

The rest of the Christmas holidays passed in a blur. Hermione's work ethic returned, but this time with a vengeance. Not only was she determined on keeping her grades where they had always been, but swore to herself that she would be the best cat mommy ever. Hermione worked or spent time with Ron and Harry during Marta's naptimes, and played with Marta when she was awake. Before long, they had a set routine.

Marta would wake up at six thirty, hungry and needing to use the litter box. Since this was a half hour earlier than Hermione usually woke up, Marta would climb on Hermione's chest and lick her face. The first couple of times Marta did this, Hermione woke with a start and sat up so quickly that if she hadn't been gripping Hermione's night shirt with her claws, Marta would have been thrown across the room.

Hermione would then get up, and place Marta gently on the floor so Marta could relieve herself in the litter box that arrived not long after Marta had while Hermione broke up pieces of meat small enough for Marta to eat.

They would then go down to the common room or, if it were nice, outside to play. For indoor games, Hermione had tied a long piece of string into a ball with a tail, and Marta had the time of her life chasing it while Hermione swung it above her head. Then Marta would become tired, so Hermione would take her upstairs, lay her on the bed and go to breakfast. After breakfast, Hermione would allow Marta to run around the Common Room while she did her homework. At lunch, Marta would be exhausted again, so another naptime was Hermione's lunch break. Wherever Ron or Harry wanted to hang out after lunch was where Hermione took Marta. Before bed, Marta would have one last energy spurt until she fell asleep. This energy burst was very much like pre-bed hyperness that small children had before they crashed for the night. Hermione found it very amusing.

When classes started again, Hermione would let Marta play in the common room while she did her homework. The runs around the Common Room kept Marta sane, but it drove the other Gryffindors nuts.

Three weeks after Marta arrived, Ron was still not talking to Hermione. In fact, none of the famous trio was talking. Ron and Hermione still had not forgiven each other about Marta's first night with Hermione, and Harry didn't want to take sides. He believed that Hermione was right about Marta, but he could see where Ron was coming from with his arguments. The common room was silent for record breaking stretches of time when Marta was taking her naps, and Hermione didn't give herself the opportunity to catch Colin Creevey racking up more points on his scoreboard.

Finally, the time came when the inevitable happened: Ron needed to copy Hermione's homework. But to copy her homework, he needed to talk to her.

In the beginning, Ron was very reluctant to do this. He had sworn to himself that until the "Mini-Monster" left or began to act the least bit civilized, he would not talk to Hermione. So he did everything in his power to try and get his homework done without Hermione's help.

"Parvati?" Ron asked Parvati one day when he were trying to finish his potions homework, which was more obnoxious then usual because his cauldron had spit fur potion into his face and now the class had to write an essay on the benefits of that same potion. "Do you have any idea why someone would want to grow animal fur on themselves, and be glad with the result?"

"Ronald Weasley, I am not answering that question!" Parvati snapped. "You may get answers from Hermione, but I will not give them to you!" And with that, she slammed her book shut and marched into the girl's dormitory.

None of the other sixth years would answer his questions, either, so Ron handed in his homework with made up answers. He figured that since it worked in Divination, it might work in Potions.

No such luck.

Professor Snape gave Ron the look that he reserved only for Harry when he handed back the homework, now with a shiny red T on it.

"Detention, Weasley. And if I ever catch you saying that Professor Dumbledore took some to make himself his own personal magic carpet again, you will be very, very, sorry."

So while oiling Filch's wrist chains with his toothbrush, Ron gave in. He would now need a new toothbrush, which he knew Mum wouldn't be happy about. He also was not about to risk making up another answer dumb enough to make his arms ache like he knew they would the next day. He also was worried about what would happen if Dumbledore should ever cave in and let Filch use these chains. They scared him beyond belief.

Finally, the last bit of oiling was done. Ron hauled himself over to where he left his bag, and something caught his eye from the corner of the bag. He opened the bag, and there sat a chocolate frog, with a note pinned on it. The note consisted of only four words:

"Thanks for the idea"

Finally, the moment came when Ron could stand it no more.

"Um, Hermione?" She pretended she didn't hear him, and kept her nose deep into her Transfiguration book.

"Hermione, I still am not your cat's biggest fan, but I think I can live with her."

She turned in her seat.

"All right, whose homework do you need?"

"Snape and McGonagall's."

"Ha ha, good luck."

"Please Hermione?

Hermione thought for a second. It would be great to have Ron back as a friend, but Marta was family. Sure, she was very hyper at times, but wasn't that what kittens do? But still…she and Ron had these fights all the time. But none of them were about The Baby.

All and all though, she missed him. But there was one thing he needed to do. She turned to him and set down the book.

"Fine. But if we're going to talk again, you need to apologize to Marta."

Marta was sleeping on a soft pillow Hermione had laid next to the table. Ron looked at Hermione apprehensively.

"Well, go on! You said you could live with her!"

Regretting his words, Ron reached down and stroked the silky long fur. She didn't tense at his touch, only stretched rolled onto her back and allowed him to rub her tummy. He could feel her silent purrs as he ran his fingers through the fluff. As soon as he tried to pull away, however, without even opening her eyes she grabbed his wrist, claws fully drawn.

"OW!" Ron hollered, pulling his hand away from her, but in the process creating long scratches down it. Hermione sniggered.

"Sorry, forgot to warn you about that part." She held up her hands. They were covered in tiny red marks, clearly scratches from Marta's claws. "Use some essence of murlap, that stuff worked wonders when Umbridge scratched up Harry's hand."

"That stuff smells awful, I'm not using it."

"Fine then, but I warn you, your hand will ache tomorrow." Hermione leaned over and pulled the kitten into her lap. The little fluff ball didn't even open her eyes and resembled a rag doll as Hermione heaved her upward. Gently, Hermione took Marta's front paws.

"It's safe now, she can't get you"

"What, you want me to apologize again?" Ron asked in disbelief. Hermione raised her eyebrow, and that expression in her eyes that Ron usually tried to avoid was growing.

"Yes, Ron, I do. Is that so difficult?"

"No."

"Prove it."

"Fine, I will." He reached out and scratched under Marta's chin. Her purrs became audible, and she seemed to be in feline heaven. This time, when Ron pulled away, there was no pain involved. He looked to Hermione.

"There, are we friends again?" He asked smugly.

"Yes." Hermione answered. Ron began to pull his potions homework out.

"No, McGonagall's, please." Hermione said, laying Marta back down on the pillow.

"What? I thought you said we were friends again." Ron responded as Marta began to lick herself free of the human germs that Hermione and Ron had bestowed upon her.

"We're close enough friends again that I'll check your Transfiguration homework, but not close enough for the Potions. You're still paying, Buddy." Hermione picked up her book again and began to settle in to read more.

"Great. What do you want me to do now? Handcraft a silver dish for Marta and serve her fresh food in it every day?"

"Not a bad idea." Ron was beginning to think that he was better off silent most of the time.

"That was sarcasm, Hermione, you know what some people consider as funny?"

"I know."

"Then what do you want?" Hermione put her book down again.

"I want a quiet night."

"What? How am I going to be able to help you with that?"

"I want you to take Marta tonight, to sleep in the boys dorms with you."

"Hermione, I sleep in a dorm with four other boys, one of them being Neville, who is afraid of sleeping with a teddy bear because it might suffocate him. How am I going to survive them with her around?"

Hermione shrugged.

"Do you think it's any easier with Lavender around? I really don't understand her – she was fine with a baby rabbit, but she can't seem to handle a kitten."

"Is there something else you want?"

"No kitty sleepover, no Potions homework."

And with that, Hermione picked up her Transfiguration book, and that was that.

"I really don't understand why you gave into her, Ron." Harry remarked, shaking his head as Ron set up Marta's litter box and food that night in the boy's dorm.

"If Mum finds out that I'm failing, my butt is going to be dragged home and pinned to the wall within a week, Harry. I need to keep my grades up." Ron said, shaking the litter box to smooth the sand.

"What about Neville?" Harry asked skeptically.

"Well, as long as I sleep with my back toward him and keep a firm hand on her, I figure we should be okay." He stood up and faced Harry.

"Pick up time is in ten minutes in the common room. Want to come with?" Harry shrugged.

"Sure, why not?"

They made their way down the spiral staircase to the common room, where a roaring fire was blazing in the fireplace. The boys took a seat in their favorite seats in front of the fire.

"So why exactly is Hermione not handing the Dracula cat over right away?" Harry asked quizzically.

"She says she needs some prepping, or something along those lines" Ron scoffed. "Honestly, she treats that cat like a little kid."

"Just remember the mother speech I gave you that night, Ron. It'll keep you sane, I swear."

"Harry? That reminder is coming a little late. I'm past sane at this point." At that moment, Crookshanks came trotting across the common room and jumped into Ron's chair, settling comfortably on his leg. Ron shook his head.

"See what I mean, Harry? Four years ago, this cat would hiss at me whenever he saw me. Now, he's so jealous of that blood-sucker that he comes and sits on me." He absent mindedly began stroking the ginger head. "We're in this together, aren't we? You won't get the attention you once had, and I don't get the homework I once did."

Crookshanks began to purr. Ron was actually enjoying the cat's company. He found it sort of endearing.

Hermione came down the girl's dorm stairs holding a large pink bundle. On closer inspection, Harry could see a small black head protruding from a blanket.

Hermione made her way to where the boys were sitting and faced Ron. Seeing the bundle, Crookshanks jumped off Ron's lap and walked toward the girl's dorm, tail high with indignation.

"That cat is too smart for his own good," Ron marveled. "He doesn't want to be anywhere near that de – kitten. What's the blanket for? I thought you gave me everything."

"This is her lucky blanket, she sleeps on it every night. And make sure she sleeps on your bed with you, otherwise she might get hurt."

"Yes Mom," Ron mocked, taking the blanket. "Everything will be fine, Hermione, don't worry."

"Don't forget, she only gets half a scoop of food in the morning."

"Hermione! Relax!" Ron began to make his way towards the boys dorm, closely followed by Harry as the blanket started to squirm.

"Oh, and Ron?"

Annoyed, Ron turned to look at the nagging girl.

"What now?"

"Remember, when she wakes you up tomorrow morning, put her in her litter box first thing." Ron sighed.

"Hermione, the hardest part will be keeping Neville sane. Don't worry, I have it under control.

"RON! GET THIS BEAST AWAY FROM ME!" Neville hollered. Marta was in one of her hyper spurts, running laps around the room. She would start under Neville's bed, run under everyone else's, around the side, and then start again. The fact that she was running around like mad woman didn't bother any of the boys; in fact, they were all hoping that she would get distracted and run into wall, but Marta was marking her laps. And she was marking her laps by biting Neville's foot. Neville was sitting at the foot of his bed, trying to write a letter home to his grandmother, but was interrupted every thirty seconds.

"Neville, I don't want her running on my head! Just two more minutes, please!" Ron begged.

"OW! I WANT THIS THING PUT TO BED NOW!" Neville screamed, standing on his bed.

"I'm sure she'll stop soon, Hermione still gets as much homework done as she used to, that monster has to sleep sometime!" It was then that Marta finally plopped herself on the floor and began to lick herself.

"See? What did I tell you?" Ron picked up the small ball of fur and placed her on his bed. Miffed, Neville sat back down and continued his letter. Marta gave Ron one of her green stares of death, and proceeded to explore his bed. She looked under every blanket, and sniffed every inch.

"Good luck sleeping tonight, Ron." Harry smirked, climbing into bed.

"Would you like to take her tonight, Harry?" Ron asked innocently.

"No, that's alright, you need your Potions homework checked, don't you?"

"I'm sure Hermione trusts you more then she trusts me, Harry." At this, Harry shot Ron his own green stare of death.

"Good night, Ron." And with that, Harry pulled his covers over his head and turned in for the night.

"Good night, Harry" Ron muttered. "When Ginny gets one, guess who's babysitting, because I won't." He turned to Marta, who was now trying to explore beneath his pillow. He grabbed her bushy tail and pulled her to him. She growled at him.

"Too bad, Dracula, it's bedtime." He held her to his chest and after several moments, she stopped fighting. Instead, she began to lick his fingers.

"Ew, gross!" Ron responded, pulling his hand away. He looked the kitten in the eyes and was instantly taken aback by how large and green they were.

"My, what large eyes you have." He told her. "Now, don't ever do that again, do you understand me? I have no way of knowing where that tongue of yours has been."

Marta just stared at him with her owl eyes.

"Ron, you're starting to sound like Hermione." Harry said from under his covers.

"Say that again, Harry, and you'll spend a night sleeping in the common room."

"Sorry. Won't happen again."

"Thank you." Ron pulled his comforter higher. But Marta didn't like that, and swatted him.

"Fine, be that way." Ron muttered. He slowly began to drift off. A few minutes later, Ron felt a gentle nudge on his nose, and was not surprised when he found himself looking into a pair of shiny tennis balls. Marta curled herself up right there, and Ron felt his heart melt. He reached out to pet her, and she began to purr.

"You're really not so bad." He said to her.

Marta just purred some more, curling herself tighter.

And it was at that moment, the moment of reconciliation, that Marta suddenly stood up.

She stood up to vomit all over Ron's pillow.


	7. Late Night Conversation

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: This chapter is much, much shorter than the other chapters, but I needed something to bridge. I've tried many many ways, but this was the best thing that came out of it. So forgive how long it's been, and forgive its length. I'll try to make it up to you in the next chapter.

It wasn't that Hermione had wanted a quiet night. Marta was actually worn out by the time she was ready to head up to the dorm anyway. No. It was that she wanted sometime with Crookshanks.

She still loved him very much, but he was feeling like as small child does when a new sibling is born. But with small children, there are usually two parents so one can stay with the older child. Crookshanks had no one – only Hermione and Marta. Hermione had never wanted Crookshanks to feel out of the loop on anything.

That's why she unloaded Marta with Ron for a night.

Just as long as he didn't have enough and throw her up the girl's dorm stairs, the night was for her and Crookshanks. There was no little growling black fur ball involved.

When Hermione came back upstairs from dropping Marta off, her human roommates were already asleep. Crookshanks was curled up in his corner, halfway there as well. He was facing the wall, which meant that while he was choosing to sleep in the same room as Hermione, he wasn't about to forgive her.

Hermione sat down next to him, and began to stroke his ginger head. She felt him startle at her touch, but he refused to purr at first. But he was enjoying himself, so after a few minutes he gave in and purred. Hermione smiled.

"I knew that you liked it." She wrapped her arms around him and picked up the protesting cat. She carried him over to her bed and placed him on his favorite pillow. He didn't stay there, like she suspected, but she knew that he would be back as soon as she crawled all the way into bed. She quickly donned her PJs and made herself comfortable. And for the second time that night, she was right. Just as she was beginning to feel one with the bed, she felt a slight thud on the other side.

Two beds away, Lavender moaned and rolled over. Hermione couldn't help but be amazed about how Lavender had fallen asleep almost instantly with out Marta in the room. She wasn't a bad kitten, she was just…energetic. Yes, energetic was the word she was looking for.

She didn't touch him right away. She knew that if she reached to pet him at this moment, Crookshanks would leave and the process would either end or begin again. It wasn't until that the weight at the end of the bed shifted that she knew he was coming to her.

"Hey Buddy" She cooed. He curled up underneath her arm, purring as Hermione stroked his silky head.

She knew that any mention of Marta would send him flying off the bed; but she knew that he needed a speech. Being half-kneazle, he understood everything she told him, even though he sometimes pretended not to. Honestly, whoever said that cats weren't intelligent had never met Crookshanks, and it would be better for the speaker's sake never to do so.

"Hey Carrot-Top, we need to talk.' Hermione said gently. Crookshanks didn't budge.

"I know you're awake. And I know you understand everything I'm saying. So stay there. She is here to stay. And I was hoping that you could be a little bit more supportive of her." Crookshanks didn't lift his head.

"It's not like I don't love you anymore. Because I do. You are still my Carrot-Top, King of the Dorm, and my Buddy. But we have a new addition to our small family, so please please please be a supportive uncle. I really want this to work.

Crookshanks lifted his head again. His eyes were still narrowed menacingly. But then he nudged his head against Hermione's hand, asking for the attention he used to always receive.

"So we're civil with each other again?" Hermione asked?

Crookshanks just purred and stretched, falling asleep draped across Hermione.


	8. One Big Happy Family

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"Hermione, that little monster is never sleeping in our dorm again."

Hermione sighed. It was enough that Parvarti and Lavender were continually hinting that Ron have Marta over for a sleepover every night, but now Neville wouldn't allow the cat to stay in his dorm either. Crookshanks, at least, was more willing to tolerate her. The only other person who would have anything to do with Marta and distrupt Hermione's homework with phrases such as "Get this monster out of this common room!" was Ron, who couldn't seem to get enough of her.

At the same moment when Neville was complaining to Hermione about "El Diablo", Ron was over in the corner of the common room playing peek-a-boo with her. Marta really didn't understand the game, but she was having the time of her life smacking his hands when he pulled them away from his face. Her feathery tail was swishing in playful agitation.

Hermione dropped her quill and placed her head in her hands, pulling herself together. Finally, she sat up and looked Neville in the eye.

"I'm not giving her up, Neville."

"I didn't say you had to. I'm just saying she's not sleeping in our dorm again."

"Then she won't. I don't even think I'm going to confine her to the dorms anymore, either. She can climb stairs now. I think I'm going to give her free roam, now, as long as it's inside."

Neville stared at her.

"Hermione, that cat is a menace. You can't give her free roam."

"Well, I can't very well keep her locked in the girl's dorm all the time, either."

"You either put that cat outside, or keep her in your dorm. She is NOT, and I repeat, NOT spending another night in the same room I sleep in."

At this very moment, Hedwig flew in through the common room window. Marta's attention was instantly swayed from Ron as she watched the white bird soar over head and land in front of Harry, a letter tied to her leg. Ron, knowing something might happen if action was not taken, picked up Marta and held her close to him. Hedwig eyed Marta beadily with her amber eyes, not entirely sure that she trusted Ron's grip. Harry, sensing the tension between the two animals, quickly removed the letter from Hedwig's leg.

Hermione and Neville watched this scene with interest.

"That is why I currently cannot allow Marta to roam the grounds freely, Neville."

"Than keep her in your dorm, Hermione. She's banned from ours. Our dorm still smells and my foot hurts."

"What spell did you use to clean it up? It should not have been a problem to clean up. As for your foot – wait a minute, what happened to your foot?"

"Ron didn't tell you?" Hermione looked across the common room again, where Ron was snuggling Marta to the point where she was growling at him.

"No, he didn't. Enlighten me."

"Right before she finally fell asleep, Marta did laps around the room –"

"Let me guess – she used your foot as the lap mark?"

"Yes." Neville pulled off his shoe and pulled down sock to reveal many tiny puncture wounds on the back of his foot.

"Neville, I'm sorry about that. Did you see Madam Pomfrey about that?"

"No. I figured it could be healed normally."

"Suit yourself, then." Hermione yawned, stretched, and leaned over to grab a book out of her bag. But as she rustled through it's contents, her eyes widened in horror.

"Crap! I left my Arithmancy book in the library."

"Curfew isn't for another twenty minutes," Neville said, trying to help. "You can make it if you run." Hermione checked her watch. Neville did have a point.

"I'll be back soon." And with that, Hermione grabbed her cloak and exited the portrait hole.

The stone corridors were cold as Hermione made her way down them. The low lighting gave them an eerie feel which made Hermione slightly nervous. Harry had always had a thing for the dark and mysterious – is this why he made regular trips outside the common room after hours? Hermione felt that she was breaking some big school rule, even though she kept reminding herself she was still technically allowed to be out of the common room. Nevertheless, she wanted to hurry.

She had just reached the table with her Arithmancy book on it when she heard the voices of Professor Snape and Professor Dumbledore. Thoroughly scared now that her chances for Head Girl were jeopardized, Hermione grabbed the book and ran in the other direction, unable to block out the conversation she wanted no part of.

"…house elves are getting angry…"

Until then.

Hermione weighed her choices. She had five minutes to make it back the common room unscathed, but it was not at all far and as a sixth year, close companion of the Weasley Twins' younger brother, and Harry Potter, she was confident that she could make it. And she was a prefect. Sure, she wasn't supposed to be on duty tonight, but she could fake that she got the schedule mixed up.

But then again, what kind of Head Girl mixed up schedules?

But the House Elves were angry, and that settled things right there.

"I know that. Every faculty member on the staff knows that. But we've been watching our students closely. You know that."

"Nevertheless, Severus, someone is continuing to take food from the kitchens by means of butterbeer. If the culprit is not found within the next month, I will begin investigating the staff."

"Albus, you can't be serious."

"For once in my life over something besides the Dark Lord, Severus, I'm not."

Hermione knew this was her cue to head back to the common room. If Dumbledore was warning Snape, then McGonagall had to be watching her students as well.

Hermione made it back into the common room two minutes past nine without any indication that there would be consequences. In the ten minutes she had been gone, the common room had somewhat cleared out. Ron had resumed playing peek-a-boo with Marta, even though it was clear her attention was wandering. Crookshanks was sitting under the table Ron was sitting at, not worried at all about being kicked. Harry was draped over his favorite squashy armchair in front of the fire with his legs hanging over one of the arms, absorbed in Qudditch Through The Ages.

Nonchalantly, Hermione sat in the other armchair and began to read her Arithmancy book.

Harry ever so slyly peeked around the corner of his book.

"Don't you ever get tired of that stuff?"

"Never," answered Hermione without looking up. "I find memorizing this relaxing."

"Mental," Harry shook his head.

"What is?"

"You."

"Me?"

"Yes you."

"Oh right. This is the conversation we've had every year."

"You bet it is."

"Then why are you starting it?"

"What?"

"Why are you starting a conversation we've already had ten times?"

"You haven't memorized it yet?"

"Of course I have. You say 'Mental'. I say 'What is?' You say 'You.' I say, 'Me?' You say, 'Yes, you.' I say 'Why am I mental?' You say 'That stuff usually stresses people out. For you it works as a sedative. Ironic, isn't it?' And that's when I start yelling at you, because you usually bring this up when I'm all worked up about something."

Harry was impressed.

"God, you're good."

"And while we're on the topic of subjects we consider dead, I need to talk to you about the House Elves."

"Not again," Harry groaned.

"Yes, again. Do you want that rant again?"

"Fine. What about the House Elves now?"

"They're still being drugged. When S.P.E.W. has enough funding, this is going to be one of the first topics we tackle."

"How are we going to tackle this one? It seems that as soon as you figure out who did it, you'll hex them."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that especially when it comes to your house-elves, when you're angry you're not the most clearheaded person in the world."

He had a point, Hermione thought to herself.

"Harry, it's just that now Dumbledore is getting really upset. The doors to all the common rooms are being watched constantly now. Don't attempt to go anywhere after curfew, okay? This is not being treated lightly."

Harry was taken aback.

"How do you know this?"

"When I snuck into the library to retrieve my Arithmancy book. Dumbledore was somewhat threatening Snape that unless the culprit is not found within the month, the staff are going to be questioned. With your reputation and your bloodline, Harry, you could be a prime suspect at this point. Be careful, okay?"

Harry nodded.

"Note taken. Unless I have a very good reason for sneaking out, I won't. I've made it to sixth year, don't need to be thrown out because I snuck to explore."

Harry readjusted his legs so he could get comfortable again and Hermione attempted to reread her Arithmancy book. But somehow, she couldn't. The numbers just didn't hold the awe for her that they usually did.

She was just so bothered by the whole ideal with the House Elves. Who could do such a thing? The House Elves did nothing but work, work, work for the students and staff of Hogwarts, and someone was greedy enough to drug them into unconsciousness so they could steal food and make the House Elves job harder.

It was probably Malfoy or one of the other Slytherins. Only they could stoop so low as to take advantage of those who could not defend themselves.

But if it happened more than once, why were the House Elves falling for it every time?

It was useless. She could not concentrate any longer on Arithmancy.

Her eyes began to wander. Seamus was attempting a new spell and it looked like he had paid Neville some good cash to be his lab rat. Neville now had antlers growing out of his head and looked slightly dazed.

Pavarti and Lavender were finishing a letter to some handsome new celebrity and couldn't seem to stop giggling or whispering to each other.

Girls, thought Hermione, we're so weird.

Her eyes finally landed on Ron and Marta. Marta had totally lost interest in what Ron was doing and Ron didn't notice that Marta wasn't paying attention anymore. Marta was now watching Hedwig, who was just flying in. Harry and Hagrid were sending each other notes back and forth. Hermione didn't know what they were talking about, but Harry seemed to be enjoying it.

As Hedwig flew over the table, Marta jumped up and attacked her. It was a playful attack, but it was enough. Hedwig screeched and took Marta in her talons.

"HEDWIG, DROP HER NOW!" Harry hollered, but Hedwig ignored him. Hermione was paralyzed with fright. Ron jumped on the table to try and grab them, but Hedwig was too quick for him.

Before anyone could realize what was happening, Crookshanks's jumped out from underneath the table and using a pile of books Ron had been ignoring as a launch pad, Crookshanks leapt at Hedwig and was able to knock her to the floor. Surprised by the blow, Hedwig dropped the terrified Marta who was scooped up by Ron and brought to Hermione.

Hedwig, now at floor level, took a swipe at Crookshanks with her talon. The tabby easily swatted it away before pouncing on her.

"Crookshanks, don't hurt her!" Hermione cried. What would happen if her cat, the one who only three years earlier had basically killed Ron's rat, took out her other best friend's owl?

Crookshanks pinned Hedwig to the ground and the room watched in horror was he took her neck in his mouth. But instead of breaking the fragile bones, he picked her up and carried her to the window, where he deposited her. Miffed, Hedwig flew back to the Owlery.

The room was silent was Crookshanks, with brush bottle tail high in the air, strutted past Hermione and out one of his cat holes.

"That's what I meant," Hermione said softly. "We're a family. Crookshanks just accepted you, Marta. I think you're officially one of us now."

Marta only licked Hermione's fingers.


End file.
